Healing and inspiring stones

Take inspiration from me! I’m inviting you to step into a Japanese rock garden. In the Land of the Rising Sun and endlessly blooming cherry trees, they know a thing or two about beauty. They’ve mastered the subtle science of Solitude and the fine art of quietly contemplating the Divine.

The dry garden of Ryoan-ji Temple in Kyoto is the ultimate expression of stone philosophy. Stripped-down minimalism at its most captivating: fifteen dark stones, each ringed with moss, set against a white gravel canvas. No fountains. No flowerbeds. No sprawling trees to steal your focus from the heart of this black-and-white mystery — the elusive location of the fifteenth stone.

From any ground-level vantage point, you’ll see fourteen. That’s it. Only by sinking deep enough into yourself to brush up against enlightenment (or by physically gaining enough height above the garden) will you spot the thing hidden from uncurious, dimmed eyes.

Hear Me Out! The dull thud of a falling rock is hardly the limit of my largely unstudied talents. Fans of sharp, unexpected acoustic thrills can discover a whole new soundscape in Karelia and Pennsylvania. These are the places where you can catch the chorus of discordant voices sung by ancient volcanic “singing stones.” With the help of special little hammers, enthusiasts coax surprisingly melodic, metallic notes from these rocky performers. Folklore has it that concerts in this stony philharmonic hold healing powers. Scientists, however, remain diplomatically silent — the true source of the sound still hasn’t been pinned down.

Love Me! Like a loyal family dog. Like the people of South Korea or China. Pet rocks are having a bit of a moment again, offering quiet companionship to the lonely. The idea first struck Gary Dahl, an American who managed to sell over a million of these pebble companions for Christmas in 1975.

After a few decades of silence, the yearning for eternal, wordless friendship flared up again during the COVID-19 pandemic. Russian online marketplaces now proudly offer kinder, more zoo-like variants — rocks painted to look like owls, cats, or deer. But for the purists, there are more enigmatic, untouched specimens available too. They don’t bark. They don’t bite. And they’ll patiently wait for you at home. Which is a blessing for those who prefer a single bed to heartbreak and romantic disasters.

And don’t be shy about showering your rocky companion with tenderness the old-fashioned way. They’ll never turn down a heart-to-heart chat or a gentle pat. Gifts are welcome too — and no, not plastic flowers, thank you very much. That’s an insult. Dead giveaway you’re a pet rock newbie. For now.

They’re much more into trendy stickers, hip little outfits, and quirky accessories. A custom-designed miniature home wouldn’t go amiss either — received, of course, with the sort of silent gratitude only a rock can muster. The pet rock fashion industry is up and running, and trust me, it’s gaining momentum.

Wear Me! Around your neck is fine too. Just in case you need to shake off those recurring urges to drown yourself — for good this time. Sorry, I couldn’t resist. Always happy to dive into some existential musings at the first opportunity.

Amulet stones — another eternal love story. A love affair between the enlightened and those eager to follow in their mystical footsteps.

Moss agate for insomnia. Emerald for heart attacks. Moonstone for kidney colic.

Or better yet: agate for safe travels, emerald for inner peace, moonstone for divine inspiration.

Sounds like the ravings of a chatty stone, doesn’t it? Even the editors over at THE GLOBAL TECHNOLOGY magazine are throwing me sideways glances. I don’t believe in the mystical powers of stones. I don’t. You can throw you-know-what at me for it.

But should you manage to magically “attract” immeasurable wealth and otherworldly love into your life — well then, that elusive fifteenth stone might suddenly come in handy after all.

Send Me! By mail, as a gift, if I happen to be a tiger’s eye. The lucky recipient will happily add me to their collection of lucky charms.

But I’m talking about something else here. About how to elegantly hint to a conversation partner on the other side of the screen that they’ve officially become a bore. I suggest doing it with style — with a literal stone face. The inspiration for this emoji? The Moai statue in Tokyo, a popular spot for meetups.

I can already see your eyes lighting up at the mention of the placebo-like powers of minerals to “attract” unearthly love and all kinds of happiness. Oh, just wait till you see what I can do in the world of tech.

Cook with me! Let me pave a rocky road straight to your heart via a cutting-edge, stress-busting culinary technology. A nostalgic nod to the good old Russian stove where everything would gently stew and turn golden brown — meet the baking stone, now making itself at home in both professional and humble domestic ovens. This invention dares to challenge the reign of the classic baking tray. The stone absorbs and radiates heat evenly, ensuring your baked goodies emerge from the oven perfectly golden, with no tragically charred edges to ruin your day.

Eat me! Relax — a little stone humor. You should’ve seen your face just now. Looked like one of those Moai statues in Tokyo suddenly came to life. Now, let me recommend a few intriguing dishes from the world of stone food. A curious invention, I must say.

Let’s start, shall we, with Chinese “fried stones.” Recipe? As simple as it gets. Toss some smooth pebbles into a pan with oil, garlic sauce, and spices. Done! Keep the stones as a memento — everything else is perfectly edible. The name of the dish roughly translates to “suck and discard.” A delicacy that never fails to stun foreigners, this ancient culinary trick was historically used by Chinese boatmen as a hunger hack during long crossings: pretending to eat so their stomachs would quit grumbling.

Next up, we move on to heartier rock-laden cuisine. Meet Bolivia’s spicy soup Kalapurka — guaranteed to leave no one hungry. Not because of the volcanic stones bobbing around in your bowl (though they do make quite the impression), but thanks to the rich combo of meat, vegetables, cornmeal, and spices. The stones aren’t for flavor, but to keep the stew piping.

Heal with me! You’re going to love this. Stone therapy has been officially patented as a massage technique. Hot stones — or hot ones alternating with cold — tackle stress, chronic fatigue, headaches, and muscle pain like seasoned pros. Basalt, jadeite, marble, jade, and smooth sea pebbles will help you drift into a state of blissful relaxation. The healing effect is built on a simple contrast: hot stones dilate blood vessels and relax the body, while cold stones constrict vessels, reduce swelling, relieve inflammation, and tone up muscle tissue. This therapeutic game of “hot and cold” boosts vascular elasticity like nothing else.

Smile with me! A psychoanalyst’s couch isn’t the only way to find your way back to joy. Lithotherapy (yes, it’s a thing) is successfully used for emotional adjustment. Transforming pent-up negativity into creative acts and visualizing your troubles helps open new doors when the old ones slam shut and you feel trapped. During a session of this art-meets-stone therapy, you might be asked to lay out a pebble picture of your emotionally exhausting day, craft a portrait of that one insufferable coworker, arrange an ornament, or paint your very own boulder. The act of manipulating the object helps relieve built-up tension all on its own. Plus, the “stone flower” you create becomes a channel of communication between you, the outside world, and your therapist. Some tangled inner feelings aren’t meant for words. Try immortalizing your elusive self in stone.

Leave me behind. Stone has been a cornerstone — pardon the pun — of ritual technology for millennia. One of humanity’s earliest memory-keeping techniques involved nothing more than a broken pebble. In 2017, the Cambridge Archaeological Journal revealed the sacred significance of these small stones. Back in the Paleolithic era, ancient people would crack pebbles as part of rituals, using ochre to anoint the dead.

The tradition was picked up by menhirs — those imposing stone giants that still dot the landscape today, standing upright in silent testimony to ancient worlds. Ranging from 4 to 20 meters tall, their original purpose remains one of history’s stubborn mysteries. Scholars debate whether these motionless slabs were primitive beacons, deities in stone, or memorials to revered ancestors. One thing is certain: even prehistoric humans recognized stone’s uncanny “memory effect” and harnessed it in their sacred practices. Turns out they knew what they were doing — their monuments endured, weathering time in Europe, Siberia, Asia, and Africa alike.

Cultic megalomania? Not at all. Just a fact of life — the Stone Age isn’t over. Ritual technologies of the consumer society now reshape gravestones into personal art objects, eternalizing the values of the departed. In a cemetery in Novosibirsk, a granite Mercedes headstone marks the grave of famed businessman Boris Chubarov. Across the ocean, in a New Jersey cemetery, another stone Mercedes has come to a final stop behind the mausoleum of Raymond Tse Jr., who had tragically passed before he could drive the car of his dreams.

Worried I might not be eternal? That time will leave no stone unturned, even me? Fair concern. So here’s my final tip — for today. If you happen to stumble upon your fifteenth stone, entrust it — with all its accumulated meanings and personal myths — to a digital preservation technology. Leave your mark on The Wall Global, a place where nobody kicks what they don’t understand.

I hope we’ve understood each other.

After all, it’s those who don’t watch their step who trip over a cobblestone. With that attitude, even a diamond could become a stumbling block.

Wait — was that a gentle stroke?

Alright then… time for a song.